If only I could go back and begin again!

Life plays fate games with us

It keeps us always in guess.

I live with a dread in my chest

What I may find out next?

and even if there is nothing to worry

I search for a woe in a hurry.

A voice keeps telling at the back of my head

I have to cry over all the leaves shed.

Despite the changes in season

a part of me dread for no reason.

As people around me hustle and bustle

I m left with my buddies, none other than hassles.

My heart is one delicate piece, I m so broken

life has left me thoroughly shaken.

This is not how I wanted to be

I want to be strong, proud to be me.

I have no idea of a content life

to subdue my foolish fears and bring myself alive.

I m the only one to be blamed

letting my negatives take over the positive flame.

Damage done to my life cannot be undone

there is no helping hand to lend.

In this adventurous journey called life 

at any rate, we have to resolve and thrive.

If only I could go back and begin again

to be a good role model for others, but in vain.

International Day of Happiness

Hi all..

Its 20^th  March  2013. The first ever  International Day of Happiness. It was a few months ago that United Nations finally marked a day for happiness  too. It is a movement by United Nations to promote happiness as a universal goal as it is one of the main factors  that determine the well being of humans .

So what is your  idea of Happiness?Lemme think... What is it that makes me happy ?Getting to spend quality time with my family is one. Getting excited and inspired of small things of creativity and getting engaged in those activities makes me happy. Like blogging for now. The hobbies may vary with time. But it gives me the same feeling- “Happiness”. Holidays used to be one of my happiness when I had a job. The feeling of joy when weekend was about to arrive was so immense.I can see it in my husband who always looks forward to weekends so that he can relax. Whatever it is, all these things are only a few of the reasons to be happy.. But if you are not basically happy with your life , its difficult to find happiness in all the small things around you.

Talking about the happiness among  people who are above the poverty line ,its sad  to know that most of the people are unhappy. So even if we believe that money can buy happiness(Who isn’t happy if he gets a good pay, a beautiful house, car and all?) its not entirely true to the core.To achieve happiness through out, we have to make it a point to lead a stress free balanced life. Some of the factors I believe which contributes to happiness are

#1 Job satisfaction: If  you are not happy with your job, chances are you will remain unhappy forever. So take the first step. Do whatever you can to change the situation. If this is not what you wanted to do, try hard and change the field. If its not about the field and you are disappointed on the fact that your  sincere work is not being given much recognition, then discuss with your boss on the matter. If still there is no  benefit, then act fast.Try hard and get another job and ditch the old company ASAP.Years will be wasted if you are late in taking action.

#2 Healthy relationship: Wife husband should be in good terms with each other. I am so lucky to get a loving and understanding husband. Of course we are just happily married (almost 2 years). Talking about the couples who are married for many years and busy with their kids, Even if they love each other, some of them crave for their old times.The magic disappears when you hoard your feelings. Small gestures of love and care spreads happiness throughout one's life. Say what you feel, serve him the best , be there with him always and he will be always there for you. I believe it’s a give and take policy! After all this relationship is not like that of a mother and a kid where mother is willing to do anything for her kid, expecting nothing in return. No person is perfect. I have negatives. He also has negatives.But if we fairly complement each other, that makes a happy, good  couple.

#3 Stop worrying: Now this is an area where I have to put effort and more practice. I m basically an easily worried person. I get easily tensed thinking how some things gonna work out? What should I actually decide about it? And the endless list of questions arise in my mind despite the fact that I am a true God believer. I know I should leave everything to God.Yeah that’s what I do.But the fact remains that we just cant sit idle leaving everything to God. God wants us to take decisions when the situation demands.And we should truly believe in that decision once we take it.

   

#4 Stress management: I think am ok in it.One big piece of advice from my husband is to never ever allow job stress to creep over our family life. Stress should be managed somehow, frustrations should not be thrown over your family. It will ruin the happy family life.

#5 Spirituality and gratitude: Believe in God. Spirituality is a must for a balanced life and the hereafter. I do pray to the Almighty Allah. But I wish I could dedicate more time in spirituality. Its one of my constant resolutions which of course is never maintained. Sometimes for a week I stick to the routine of reading good books on it and then again I will be back to my old routine .mm.. wish I could do something to improve my determination.Speaking about gratitude we should always feel thankful to God. There may be hardships in life.But remember all the good things you have which most of the people in this world don’t have. Shelter, food and family are truly blessings from God.

#6 Do good deeds: Serve others. Make it a practice to give more.Of course, in todays world if you are too good  people will see you as a doormat .Dont let others walk over you.But its good to be good.Do good, be good and you will feel good about yourself.When you find out you make others happy, you will feel happy yourself.

#7 Avoid shopaholism: I wasn’t and I am never much of a shopaholic. So I believe I don’t have to improve much in this area. Yeah we all know that it gives us a happy feeling when we buy something new. But I believe one should strictly refrain from being a shopaholic. When you buy something it gives you only temporary happiness and then what? You will have to go buy something again to make yourself happy. Its time for a thought for the shopaholics out there. Ask yourself “ Don’t I have enough items in my possession?Adding something to my already big collection of shoes/clothes/accessories is what that really makes me  happy?Thinking of all the blessings I already have, isnt more than enough for me to be happy?"

These are only a few things now i can think of.

What do YOU think that makes you happy?

Rain

Let the rain drizzle

and my grief melt and dribble.

Let the rain borrow 

all my aching sorrows.

Even if its for a few moments

I will be free from the torment

Cause such is the pain

joy,I can no longer feign.

When the rain dance

it gives me a chance

to be light as a feather

in such a damp weather.

I can now swirl in glee

feeling all my sorrows flee.

Oh rain! can you stay forever

so that my sorrows come never.

Back with a Bang!

Heylo friends!!!
     I m back into blogging!I cant believe its one year since I last posted.Time seems to fly super fast.Since when I got busy with work, I have completely ignored my blog. A few months back I left my job and moved into U.A.E with my hubster. Enjoying the new role of a homemaker. What is the routine?Its cooking for my husband, night outs and occasional eat outs at food courts and restaurants which I enjoy.But but.. something somewhere is missing .I m  a kinda person who always find something amusing to keep myself active and busy.But somehow, my whole routine has changed since when I reached here. Of course I love cooking. But when I m finished with it and he is gone to office, I m doing nothing! I 've become a couch potato! Very lazy, very sleepy and going through facebook wall all the time.Easily got bored of this routine and started wondering "I was not like this!!What is that I used to do?What were my hobbies and interests?" And then I came back to my long forgotten blog. I like reading. But no heavy stuff ok. I do like writing.Especially poems.Sometimes I scribble some words here and there in pieces of paper I get at that moment and places it somewhere. Never ever bothered to collect and arrange it, let alone edit and post it in the blog. Poetry is a beauty. Poetry-Words arranged beautifully to portray a truth of life or something entirely opposite to reality born in someone's wild imagination. Sometimes a combination of both.I LOVE poetry!

My new found interest is painting. I admire art work.I am now a bit inspired seeing my sister-in-law's and my brother's paintings.I m planning to give it a try. The problem with me is I am interested in almost everything that is creative and wish to try everything but not skilled in anything particular. I dont know what my real thing is.Sorry  if I sound wierd. Thats me! I m a wanderer in my own thoughts in a never ending search to find what my calling is. Whatever it is, I will be exploring  my "SELF" and will be sharing in this li'l space of mine. Hope you all spend a li'l bit of time to run your eyes through my posts.You will find my creations, my thoughts and reviews and other pretty things that are cute enough to grab my attention. Some of them may be crap thoughts for you.But still I hope you will get something somewhere in this blog that you can relate to.And will be happy to hear any suggestions on my blog throughout.

Stay Tuned!

Wish you a Happy day ahead!

A love poem

"Things around have never been the same
since when my eyes met urs..
Whatever I do, its amazing
the way I end up dreamin of u..
How can anyone be lost in someone's thoughts so long?
Is this the way one feel in love?
Your thoughts give me a restless heart
longing for your presence every second.
A heart for a heart, is what we seek in love
I m lucky to get a beautiful heart like yours..
Day by day, we are getting closer..
I'm in love with love and with you, my love.
Your spell is working wonders on my heartbeats
I feel like , I'm not mine anymore..
Falling in the depth of your love, I realize
all I now need, is to be with u.."Azmina Baboo

Self Exploration

Do anyone among us make an attempt to know ourselves completely? I know, there is no need of the word “completely” in that sentence. Because, most of us may not have taken even the first effort to know oneself. With a fast- paced life offered by today’s world, who has got time for such things? And even if time provided , why engage in such rubbish things?

Then, there is a second category of people who are wishing to learn about themselves, but gets fed up easily or is somewhat afraid of what they may find out. I am one among them. Frankly speaking, I have a tendency to back out sometimes from knowing or exploring myself. One is afraid of what they are gonna find out. We human beings have both positive and negatives sides. While we are happy to find out what our positives are ,we keep a closed eye to our negatives. We can work upon our negatives and slowly improve, but for that we have to understand our negatives first. So knowing oneself is necessary.

Its in human nature to run away from problems. When confronted with a difficult situation , we face it and try to solve it only in the last minute, when there are no other ways to escape. Thats what I sometimes do. When I am fed up with giving my thoughts to a problem, i just drop that train of thoughts, which gives me a temperory escape. Its exactly the wrong thing to do. Cause one’s thoughts form the base of one’s self, No matter how negative or discouraging the thoughts are. “The way one thinks”, defines the person and running away from one’s own thoughts means running away from oneself. Of course, we can improve on our way of thinking, but should not run away from one’s thoughts itself.

Sometimes the way of learning one self turns out to be wrong. Some are bound to find only their flaws, That kind of self exploration should be got ridden soon without getting messed up with oneself. If started with the right spirit, one will slowly learn to identify with their positives, aims, dreams, together with accepting their flaws. You have just to make a gentle start on exploring yourself. Eventually your hidden talents will come out, that you thought you never had.

Even though I am always curious about knowing myself, i sometimes gets stuck somewhere in between. Quite usual! Because knowing oneself is a tremendously complicated task. And the fact remains that , no one among us has ever explored the so called “self” completely. Self Exploration continues throughout our whole life. Things this much said, it seems like I am sounding too much philosophical nowadays. Maybe the side-effects of “self-exploration”.;):D

A Battle between Heart and Mind!

In difficult times of mine,

I ask my heart, what to do?

But my mind crops up yelling

"I know better than she does!"

I find it hard to decide,

to whom should I listen?

Why is it that both of them

never goes in the same boat?

Should have made my life more easier

if they always sung in synch.

But no!They ends up fighting

leaving me in a state of apathy.

Heart and mind are always in a rattle

engaged in a never ending battle.

What will happen in the end?

Lets wait and see, who's gonna bend?

Azmina Baboo.

I m back!!

hello everyone,
its been a long long time , since i posted something..yup, got a li'l busy wth life..Its true that one has to get some free time and "mood" to frame ones thoughts properly.And when u r in that right mood, u feel able to frame the thoughts in the right way,with the right intensity. Some of my posts were waiting to get posted for a long time. Now that i feel like my "mood" is back, here i am, completing my pending posts, before it leaves me!!!!
Hope u enjoy!

random thoughts..

" I maybe independent in all the sense,
But still, i m wrapped in invisible chains.."

-Azmina Baboo

Star Gazing

With hands on the back of my head;

Breathing slowly, I lay on the ground.

I was staring at the stars,

that embellished the moonless sky.

Its been a long while now;

since I had a rendezvous with you.

The long night musings I shared;

in wordless language with you.

Hearing the stars whisper to me;

"Where have you been so long?"

I smiled and shared my thoughts;

like I used to do!

They glowed with all their might;

taking in turns, one by one!

As if its some kind of gesture;

That, only I can understand!

I lay there for some more time;

talking to my night sky friends.

Then I said goodbye, for a while;

promising another rendezvous soon!

"The monk who sold his Ferrari"

Hello Friends,

This is my first post in the book review section. Its about "The monk who sold his Ferrari" by Robin Sharma. The author is well known for his "self help" books in which he explains how to improve one's life in an effective way. It is one of the most popular books in the self help category and most of us may have read it by now. For those who have read it already, let this review be a revisit, because its the kind of book worth reading through out our hectic life.

The story is about a successful lawyer, Julian Mantle who has reached the summit of success that is admirable. He lived a successful life driven by his own abilities. He owned a grand mansion, a private jet and a red ferrari. But his obsession with professional success lead him to work day and night without taking care of his mental and physical health. Suddenly one day, he has to face the consequences of his unbalanced life.

The story begins with John, a friend and co-worker of the protagonist, describing the fantastic lifestyle and clever courtroom tricks of the great lawyer. But one day, he collapses in the courtroom because of a heart attack. He was looking more older than his age. He loses his purpose of life and one day he goes somewhere without telling anyone.

After three years, without any news, Julian Mantle visits John. John was surprised with his new look. He was completely transformed into a healthy human being, with a glow in his face. John asks about his story and he describes that after recovering from heartattack, he sold all his properties including his Ferrari and went to India. He wanted to restore the balance of his life and in search of that, he reaches a small place called Sivana, near Himalayas. There lived a group of sages, whose leader teaches him everything that he seeked for. He is filled with a new spiritual strength. He imparts the new found wisdom to John. All the tips to lead a life filled with positive energy, peace and joy was described in the form of fables by the sages. Julian Mantle explains to his friend ,how to cultivate our minds with joyful thoughts only. He expains the value of time and to use it to fulfil our dream. He advises John to embrace the present always and to never live in the past.After that he embraces John and leaves.

This book comes in handy for those who are always in a rat race for success, because of which they are having a stressful life. The principles to lead a happy, balanced life is penned down in the form of fables by the author, so that readers can memorize it more easily and follow it in their lives. The author imparts the knowledge of leading a balanced, happy, successful life in a step-by-step approach which makes the book more understandable.

Past, Present & Future.

Past is gone, Future is unknown;
Life is about living in the present.
Past has rendered me sweet memories;
Future never gave me a clear picture.

Memories that are to be cherished,
Can sometimes be a pain.
Cause, now they are invading,
All my day's thoughts!

And the fuzzy days to come,
Arent much helping either.
Trying to keep track of tomorrow,
Robs my every night's sleep!

Life cant be dwelled in memories, I know.
But, why cant I make myself understand?
Past is haunting, Future is taunting;
Stuck in between, is poor me!

Life is not in yesterday & tomorrow;
It exists in this moment, right now!
It may be just a fleeting second;
But life is like, now or never!

Bidding adieu to good old memories;
I'm just gonna live this moment!
What I now need is,
My "presence" in my "present"!

Azmina Baboo.

Bollywood Shayarees.

One of my hobbies are collecting shayaris..I LOVE them. This post includes my favourite shayaris from bollywood movies...

Hume tho apno ne luta

gairon mein kaha dum tha

meri kashti thi dubi wahan

jahan pani kum tha

-From the movie "Dilwaale".

This one is the first shayari that comes to my mind when its all about shayarees. My most favourite one, from the Ajay Devgan movie "Dilwaale". The shayari itself is so deep and the way Ajay devgan presents it in the movie makes it so beautiful. After that soon follows the heartfelt song "Jeeta tha jiske liye, jiske liye martha tha" which completes that scene. Those who have a taste for shayarees will never forget this one if they have watched the movie. Remember Ajay devgan as a mad guy with Raveena Tandon and Sunil Shetty?..

Kahin aag lagne se pehle

uttha hai aisa dhuaan

jaisa hai idhar ka nazaara

vaisa hi udhar ka samaa

-From the movie "Pardes".

Kaate nahin kat the, lamhe intezaar ki

nazren bichaein baite hai raste pe yaar ke

Dil ne kaha dekhe jo jalwe husne yaar ke

laya hain kaun falak se utaar ke

-"Hum aapke hai kaun".

Tere dil mein meri saanson ko panah miljaye

tere ishq mein meri jaan fana hojaye

-From the movie "Fanaa".

Aag suraj mein hain

jalna zameen ko padtha hai

mohabbat nigahein karti hai

thadapna tho dil ko padtha hai

-From the movie "Fanaa".

My heart's unknown desire..

Day in and day out

I'm craving to find,

What's my heart's desire?

that makes me to myself, bind.

My heart aches for something

I know, for sure.

But what does it ache for?

I have no clue, damn sure.

Some unknown passion

is dwelling in there.

How can I fulfil it?

When I am unaware.

As the time passes,

Its burning like fire.

When will I find out?

My heart's unknown desire...

Noone can chase away my dreams!

I closed my eyes in the dark of night

in hope and anticipation of a good dream..

and then my dream spilled in colours

over my heart's canvas for a new picture...

a picture so rich in life, so full of beauty

a picture soaked in the sea of my hopes...

I was floating on the fluffy clouds,

wrapped around in the net of my dreams...

Suddenly was I, pulled away from its embrace

Grief filled me, as my dream faded away...

My heart broke down, I was in anguish

deep pain engulfed me leading to darkness..

But then, came an inner voice from me

as I listened, a smile blossomed on my lips...

now I know, those dreams are only mine

and noone can chase away my dreams!

and so I closed my eyes again,

waiting to get spellbound in my dreams...

Azmina Baboo

good friday vs dukhavelli

hi...

its good friday tomorrow. i dunno much abt this day.but i ve always wondered why is it called "dukha velli" in malayalam which means "sad friday". it gives opposite meaning when translated!!!! wat do u guys say??!! does any body know why is it dat way??

munnar pics

hii,

i m back after a short break! me n my family had a trip to munnar in feb n here is the scenery pics of munnar. it was a lovely trip. The place was so full of greenery with tea plantations all around u. it was an eye coolin effect. It was so freezin cold that i m nw achin 2 b there in this burnin heat f march. but the news is munnar is being effected by heat 4 the first time in history nw. All the present tourists are leavin the place. m glad we went ther in february. hope u liked the lovely pics of the "Tea town".

My new year resolutions!

With a brand new year approaching, let us hope we all are filled with a renewed energy. Let us hope 2010 brings us all its colours in the form of fulfilling dreams. Its the usual time for people all over the world to make new resolutions. As for me, it always had been the same old resolutions like to hardwork, to concentrate more on studies, to gain better marks...blah..blah.. which are, of course, made only to be broken. After all, promises are made to be broken:)

But its time to think and make new resolutions. Though they are difficult to keep and meant to be broken, we spare a few minutes to give it a thought on the new year eve. And that makes resolutions a special part of the coming new year. So i thought to think n make a few resolutions.

I'll try to always be thankful to god, for what i have and not to forget the almighty in my good times. Its in human nature to be thankless 4 what we hav got. We wish to get well settled jobs, get a better life etc. Its nice to have goals and work towards it. But we should never be thankless to god 4 what we dont have nw. Whenever i tend to forget god, lets hope i remember that ther are lots of people in the world with no food & shelter. People in Iraq arent even healthy because of the previous bomb firings! Atleast I have a good life and a loving family.

I will try to make everyone around me happy. Ok, its tough to make every one happy. Here the emphasis is on my parents. Its easy to make parents happy coz ther happiness lies in our happiness. Parents!! they are the BEST gift from god:) The effort they took in bringing up us(we their naughty children including my brothers and sisters) is really huge and to be appreciated. That kind of love can never b returned. Lets just try to make them happy.

Wish u all a very Happy New Year!

saree designing

Hello everybody,

Here comes the photos of the first new saree designed by me :) I love drawing even though i am not an expert. Besides, buying plain saree and makin patterns on them is an all time trend. So when my mom asked me if i could design a saree for her, i said yes..I did this one a few months before.

The things needed are:
one brown saree

2 bottles of Glitter(3D outliner) gold colour

2 bottles of Glitter(3D outliner) black colour

First , I created a design pattern and drew it on the saree borders with a pencil. Then i traced it with the outliner. It was left to dry for 24 hrs. n the saree is ready:)

Hope u all like it..

a ghazal by Sultana Khanim

I love to read ghazals. Urdu has been my second language in school. It was easily my best subject. But we study urdu only from a lower level. Actually its tougher than hindi, yet very beautiful. Urdu poetry is usually rich in the themes of love , romance and life.It has a philosophical aspect too. There are different types of urdu poetry like nazm, ghazal, rubaiyat etc. The ghazal i am goin 2 post is the one i came across when reading an urdu magazine long ago. i collected it. I just want to share it with my friends. So go on, read n enjoy!!

Dil aap dhadaktha hein ,dhadkaya nahin jata
yeh raaz mohabbat har ek ko bataaya nahin jata

agar ehsaas ho tho mohabbat ko karlo mehsoos

yeh woh jazba hein jo lafzon mein samjhaya nahin jata

Dosti ke liye mohabbat aur khuloos hein lazim!
har haath milaane waale ko dosth samjhaya nahin jata

bahut kam hein log jo dil mein uthar jate hein

har raah chalte ko apna banaaya nahin jata!

koshishon se badal jati hein thaqdeerein khanim
de kar ilzam kismat ko dil ko behlaaya nahin jata

-Sulthana Khanim